MEGA MILLIONS...

I checked the numbers one by one and as I confirmed each number my heart started racing.  I started to feel like all the blood was rushing to my head. My body started to go numb as I once again check the numbers...this couldn't be...EVERY SINGLE NUMBER FOR THE MEGA MILLIONS IS ON MY TICKET!! OH. MY. GOD!!!!!

I jump up from my chair and bit my knuckles as my legs take on a life of their own. I want to scream but the sound cannot come from my mouth. I want to pick up the phone and call my family and start screaming, but I can't...not yet, I open my front door and I look at the road in front of me and I want to strip off my clothes and run naked down the street screaming, but quickly figure out that I may get arrested...that would be super disasterous especially now. I close my door and my doggie Sketch runs behind me mirroring my excitement, his tail wagging swiftly as he tries to figure out what's going on. I pick him up and whirl him around, put him down and run up the stairs. I stood on the landing for a moment trying to figure out what I went upstairs for and couldn't remember. I then run down stairs and fall on my knees..."Thank you God...THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!" While kneeling, i start rocking back and forth and the tears stream from my eyes as I clutch my dreams, hopes, plans and security in the palm of my hands...I never knew I would enjoy holding a small piece of paper so much. I kiss the ticket and hold it up to the ceiling and I allow the tears and the feeling of joy to envelope me, I felt the pure, raw, feeling of freedom...free from wanting or needing. I cried for myself, my family and friends whose lives are about to change....overwhelming is an understatement.

Finally I get up, pick up my doggie and reach for my cell phone. I call my husband "baby where are you?" he said "i'm almost home." I smiled "great, cant wait to see you" and hung up. As his car pulled up, Sketch and I waited anxiously for him to enter the house. As he enters, I run up to him hugging him tight and sobbing into his chest, his eyes are bewildered "what's the matter baby" I looked him in the eyes "We are free, finally free" and I hand him the ticket. He looks at it still not getting it and I said we won the lottery...he bites his knuckles, throws his suit jacket to the ground as his arms and legs take on a life of their own and then he lets out a gutteral scream that one can probably hear from a mile away as the tears stream down his cheeks and we embrace...freedom is the best feeling in the world.

QUEEN...

I walked through the crowd, shoulders back, head held high wearing a ruffle blouse, high waist pencil skirt and peep toe heels with a matching clutch under my arm and hair neatly coiffed. I was feeling good within every ounce of my being from my hair root to my toes nails; my smile and body language said it all.

I walked by a group of women standing with wine glasses in their hand and they all looked at me as I approached them. As I got closer, I smiled and gave a slight curtsey "good afternoon ladies!" Two reciprocated, but the rest had a blank stare. Their eyes followed me as I made my way to the stage. I noticed a few brothers staring and my response was the same...a sweet smile, followed by a slight curtsey.

I walked behind the curtains to the back of the stage and the butterflies in my stomach started to erupt. I walked into the restroom and checked my makeup and touched up my lip gloss. I put down my clutch on the counter and closed my eyes and took some slow, deep, methodical breaths and said a prayer. I opened my eyes, smiled at myself in the mirror and made my way to the stage entrance. My assistant ran over to me and handed me my itinerary and notes. "You look great!" I smiled and thanked her. Suddenly I heard a loud applause and my name being called...I walked out on stage to the podium, confident, humbled and grateful. I shook the hand of the host and looked into the crowd. My eyes landed on the group of women I first encountered when I arrived. Their body language was that of intrigue, I smiled at them and for some reason, they boosted my confidence. Suddenly i decided to change my script. I turned over my papers and I let my spirit guide me....

"Queen a powerful word.  A queen is you, me and every woman in this room. A queen is a humble, confident women who is in charge of her life. She knows God and realize that her body, mind and soul is sacred. She is grateful for her blessings and doesn't diminish herself to make another person feel good; instead, she motivates,encourages and helps others. She knows how to multi-task without being overwhelmed and knows how to delegate when she is in need of a break. Queens are not perfect, they come with flaws and in all shapes, sizes and colors.  They feel what you feel, but they are in control of their emotions and doesn't "bleed" all over everyone. Queens take care of themselves to the best of their ability and they don't make excuses for not taking care of self because a queen knows that if she's no good to herself, she's no good to anyone else. Queens don't need to be envious or jealous of another because she's aware of the fact that whatever she wants out of life, she has the ability to get it. Queens realize that we all have a unique God given talent.   Queens have many friends for different purposes and she respects and understand the power of the female connection and the fact that we all need it. A queen knows how to disagree without being hurtful (for the most part) and how to be honest and upfront. She is confident about her talents and abilities and she's decisive about what she wants. A queen knows how to balance her husband, children, pets, family and friends. She doesn't worry much about what others think or say, she lives her life with purpose, passion and truth. A queen reigns supreme....that's you, me and every woman in this world. Love the queen in you and the women in your life.....Thank you!"  I looked at the group of women in the crowd and they were all crying, I blew them a kiss.
    

The applause was loud and the tears streamed down my cheeks. A queen is not afraid to be emotional in front of hundreds of people.

Be blessed.

Family....

When I think of family several words come to mind; respect, love, support, togetherness, loyalty, kindness, friendship and honesty. Certainly, I don't believe the people closest to us are perfect, but I do feel that if you are close to someone, there should be a certain level of security/comfort/love. However, as we look around us, how many of us can truly say we have all or most of the above in our family? As I grow and mature in my thinking, my perspective is changing and my definition of family and even friendship has shifted almost because I had no choice. Oftentimes I feel like our own views on family and friendship has caused many of us years of unnecessary pain. We look at our mothers, fathers, sisters, grandparents and other family members almost as deities that has an unlimited supply of endurance for drama! Too often, family members feel it's ok to take advantage of each other, saying anything that comes to mind...being demanding, disrespectful, dishonest, rude, crude and the list goes on.

I've always wondered what would happen if metaphorically speaking family was like your boss? Would you go in to work whenever you want? Tell your boss to shut up? disrespect? slam or take advantage of this person? If you did, what do you think would be the consequence? I would think that this kind of behavior would call for you being fired or at the very least be written up and given a strict warning. Why is it that some family and friends feel like it's ok to hurt the people close to them and conversely why is it that the recipient family member/friend feel like they should take it?

The answer basically is: YOU DON'T HAVE TO TAKE IT! Just like a boss can fire an employee, if someone close to you is treating you with impunity or being harmful in any way, you have a right to remove yourself from the person's presence! It is a known fact that the people closest to you tend to be the most hurtful because they usually know the most about you and what makes you tick. However, just because you are close to someone does not give them the right to use their knowledge about you....against you...it is NEVER ok to be hurtful. It's imperative that you COMMAND and GIVE respect to the people closest to you! I have seen and even experienced the blatant disrespect that can sometimes come from the people closest to you and it can be extremely painful and have a long lasting damaging effect.

It's time that people stand up and command respect from each other and it's time that people realize that they have control over their life! It's time for this negative cycle to stop. If you have someone in your life that is hurting you mentally, physically or emotionally, then it's time for you to see that person for who they are and move away from their negativity. It is a known fact that you teach people how to treat you! If you allow toxic waste to spill all over you and you don't take action, then after a while it's not the fault of the hurtful family or friends...it's YOUR fault! Be strong and protect your well being because at the end of the day, it's ALL you got!

Matthew 18:8 "If your hand or your foot causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it from you; it is better for you to enter life crippled or lame, than to have two hands or two feet and be cast into the eternal fire.

Have a wonderful and blessed week!

Are you HAPPY?

Happiness is a verb...

Have you ever come across a person who complains all the time, is quick to anger, constantly talks negative about other people or constantly thinks the glass is half empty, yet when you talk to them they swear they are happy? They walk around with their eyebrows furrowed, they hardly say hello, is usually self-centered, anti-social and always seems to have a grievance with someone.

Conversely, have you ever seen someone who lights up a room when they walk in? They greet everyone pleasantly with a smile, kiss or hug. Their demeanor is often very pleasant, they are quick to laugh and very considerate of others. They give of their resources or time and look for the good in people. When you look at them you get a good feeling in your heart because their actions are not contrived or forced, it just pours naturally from them....happy people usually bring out the best in others.

When someone is happy it's usually not because of their material possessions, they are not defined by titles, they don't always have fame or fortune, they are sometimes a regular person from around the way. Happiness usually comes from vast sources; a person being comfortable in their skin, self confidence (not narcissism), a sense of faith or a connection to a higher being. They come from a place of understanding that the glass is always half full and there is always good lurking around the corner.

Happiness comes in many different packages, but one things for sure, you never have to tell people how happy you are because happiness shines through your actions and behavior. This is not to say that happy people are perfect and don't get frustrated or upset, but they are usually content and their motive is never to hurt people. Happy people are rarely rude, disrespectful or mean spirited because happiness brings out the best in people, not the worst.

So I ask you today, Are you happy?

Have a wonderful, blessed and HAPPY Holiday weekend.

Preying money

The number 9 is a very interesting!

The number 9 represents completeness. It marks the end of the human gestation period and the end of a series of numbers (1-10), as well as a complete circle (360 degrees = 3 + 6 + 0 = 9). Christ completed his life and died at the ninth hour. Nine categories of people are called 'blessed' in the Sermon on the Mount. 9 is a complete number: if multiplied by any other number it always reproduces itself (3 x 9 = 27 = 2 + 7 = 9).

If this calculation is true, this leaves a lot of hope for the upcoming year. However, we still have to leave room for the unknown.

My husband and I brought in New Years at the watch night service at Abyssinian Baptist Church in Harlem NY. During the Sermon, Our pastor preached about the importance of positive thinking and making time for family and friends as much as possible. He said something that really resonated with me and that is "we cannot serve two Gods!" Many of us serve the God of money, material possessions and so many of us spend so much time on the job that it becomes our alter of worship. When we don't have balance in our lives it throws off the natural cycle of our living.

There is no doubt that money is necessary to live and be comfortable in this world. Money allows us to have freedom of choices (where we live, eat, travel, work etc). Right now our economy is in turmoil and it's effects are resonating throughout the country and world. Many are in panic mode because there is currently a shortage in so many areas of our society. I get a bit apprehensive everytime I watch the news because of all the layoffs....there is no doubt that these are tight times.

Everyone is on a quest to find more money whether people are working or not, money seems to be a rare commodity these days. Recently I found myself thinking of all the ways I can make money. I have been taking on all sorts opportunities here and there, spreading myself thin trying to committ to everything. At the end of the day I felt myself overwhelmed and frustrated. I know a little about this and that but mastering very few things and it's not a good feeling. I've decided to make some changes in my life this year and focus on my true hearts desires and talents. But overall, my most important focus is growing my family.

In 2009 we have the opportunity to start over again and try to make things right. It's important to be realistic about your goals and try not to procrastinate; make sure you schedule your time effectively and you will see that balance of family, work and play is very attainable. This is a good year, but every year is a good one as long as our outlook on life is positive. That outlook also applies to the bad things. When bad things happen (and they will), putting them in perspetive is very helpful in keeping a positive outlook.

Worry less, Be more humble and grateful, stay prayerful and wish others well.....

God bless.

A new year is dawning

I've been encouraged by many to start a blog. Blogs are a great way to share with the people you care about and anyone who just wants to receive and share information. I hope this blog will serve as inspiration and enlightenment to whomever that reads it. I hope and pray that 2009 will be a year of great prosperity for everyone.

As we draw closer to 2009, I wanted to reflect back on 2008 a bit.

The presidential election was one of the most exciting times in history. For the first time ever (in my lifetime), I saw people of all ethnicities coming together for a common goal and the result is we now have an African American as our President...President Barack Obama! Even more, the power that Mrs. Michelle Obama and their children will bring to the white house is priceless! I feel so blessed and fortunate to experience a time like this in our history. This occurrence alone makes 2008 one of the best years in our lifetime! Sure there were hard times, the economy sucks and people are losing their jobs. The good news...those things are cyclical and temporary and I have no doubt the market will bounce back. However, a Black man becoming president is something we will all cherish for a lifetime!

Many of us have also experienced personal tragedies, losses and upsets and many of us have seen a year filled with hope, promise and prosperity, this is the natural rotation of life and we ALL have a balance of good and bad moments. Every year isn't going to be a great year for everyone, but I will say this, your outlook on life determines what kind of year you will have. I like to learn from my experiences and I'm always working on getting better. Every year of my life is cherished because the good and bad make me who i am and I wouldn't want to change that for anything. Every year I try to extend my reach a bit further and challenge myself a bit more. If at any point i failed to accomplish something, I continue to re-evaluate my goals and dreams and carry them over until they are accomplished. Some goals you have to let go and add new ones and some goals will take longer than a year, so be patient with yourself.

Going forward into 2009, it can be a year of prosperity for all if we are willing to stay positive and put in the work it takes to become successful! However, as I've said before, success isn't just material, financial or having what some will consider a "good job." Success has to do more with the energy that you give people, the friends lives that you light up, your willingness to give and help others and the respect and admiration you get from others b/c of the good person that you are.

If you walk around being negative, unpleasant and cutting, it's going to be very hard for people to gravitate toward you. If that is an area you are lacking in, maybe it's something you can work on in the coming year! Success means absolutely nothing if you don't have friends and family that wants to share in your joy. Sometimes it helps to take the focus off of self and put your focus into something of a worthy cause. Recently when I went to New Orleans to volunteer my time, it was one of the most invigorating things I've done in a long time and something i plan to continue to do!

Decide to make 2009 your year. Plan accordingly. Work out a budget and try to stick to it, write out your goals and plans, you will see that writing them and looking at them often will help keep you on track. Wish others well, it only benefits you and remember whatever you put out to others is what you get back. Try not to be too quick to judge because you never know what is behind a person's actions and you never know when you will be in a similar situation. Life has a way of throwing curve balls, so stay humble if you are enjoying a time of good fortune...NOTHING is guaranteed!

With that, I want to wish you and your family a very prosperous, healthy and productive 2009! Celebrate with your loved ones, pray often and have gratitude for all your blessings.

Peace, Love and Blessings!